Update
I’m hoping to dust off my substack now. But first a bit of a life update. On Sunday our elders read this letter to our church. (I’ll address them in person next week).
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Dear church:
It is wonderful to address you, though I wish it were in person. As you know at the beginning of July we took our sabbatical. The hope for this in our hearts was two-fold. First, and foremost we needed to rest. We needed time to clear our heads so that we could even begin the second goal of sabbatical--asking very hard questions.
Are we still called to vocational pastoral ministry? If so, is that at Calvary? If not, what does that mean? Are we what is best for Calvary in this season? If not, what does that mean?
We knew that part of answering this question would be that God would give us a renewed vision and passion for Calvary. If we couldn’t come back at 100%, we didn’t think it would be in our or your best interest.
God has been gracious and very faithful to us (and to you) during this season. Stepping away for a season brought much needed clarity to our hearts and minds. I’d always thought of myself as a pastor who writes. But through this time away, I’m coming to see that I’m more of a writer who pastors.
I know that I’m still called to proclaim the gospel—as are all of us believers. And I know that God has called me to preach. But I’ve come to see that in order to fulfill this calling it does not have to mean that I am a pastor of a local church. In fact, I believe at least for a season (maybe a lengthy one) God is calling our family away from me being a lead pastor.
It has been the greatest joy of my heart the past couple of months to worship alongside of my family. Being able to sit next to my wife for an entire service is something we hadn’t been able to enjoy for almost twenty years. It is a blessing that I’ve missed out on to be able to hold my wife’s hand during the worship service. And it stirs up my soul to be standing right beside my family, looking over and seeing my children with hands lifted high singing praise to Jesus. I don’t have much more time with these kids, and I want to squeeze out every moment of being able to do this alongside of them.
But our hearts are indeed with you. It is difficult to make this decision. We love Calvary. It has been a great joy to pastor you. We love your hunger and passion for the Word. And we’re confident of what God is doing among you. It has been wonderful to hear reports of how He is moving in your midst. We’re excited for the days ahead. And that has made it that much easier knowing that you are in good hands.
As soon as God made it clear to our hearts that this was the right move for our family and for Calvary, we approached the elders and let them know. Since then, we’ve followed their direction for how we would conclude our time here pastoring. I’d have loved to address you in person (and we’re hoping to be afforded a bit of time next week). But we couldn’t come up with a good way to do that apart from a letter first. We didn’t want to stir up hearts or give any false impressions. Therefore, as awkward as this is—we figured why not just end as we began—awkwardly.
With this, I give you my resignation as your pastor.
We are loved. We are sent.